A Simple Guide to Happiness in the New Year (Inspired by Thich Nhat Hanh)

New year, new us, right? How can we be sure? How can we be certain we won’t carry over the same painful emotions and carry over last year’s baggage?

In addition to focusing on career goals, my fundamental wish for the new year is to be peaceful and happy, to learn from my past experiences, and to make wiser choices. 

My quest to start the year right led me to a transformative three-day New Year practice from monk and peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh. Join me as I explore this practice and share my reflections, unlocking the path to a happier new year.

New Year Three-Day Practice – First Day

On the first day of practice, we need to reflect and learn to love ourselves before spreading it to others. 

To be able to do this, Thich Nhat Hanh asks us to do the following:

1. We need to look at ourselves to see if we are at peace with ourselves. We may not be pleased with our choices and actions over the previous year. The first thing to do is to reconcile with oneself so we can learn to love ourselves. 

Per Thich Nhat Hanh, we all have qualities of love and understanding, but practicing mindfulness is necessary to nurture these qualities. So, we need to look at the qualities within us that can bring us happiness in the new year. 

2. We should pay attention to the wholesome qualities we have developed over the past year. These are positive qualities such as forgiveness, compassion, and non-discrimination. 

We should keep and encourage such positive qualities so they can continue to develop more in the coming year. 

3. Next, we should pay attention to any unwholesome qualities we may have developed, like fear, anger, and despair. 

To help us, the monk suggests we pay attention to positive things and encourage negative aspects to go to the bottom of our consciousness. We know such unwholesome seeds exist, but we will not water them and help them grow. 

We all have good and bad within each of us, but he points out that our wholesome qualities must be greater than the unwholesome ones. 

Love & Compassion Meditation

Once we have done self-reflection, the next step is to practice love and compassion for ourselves. We can do so by practicing the meditation below:

Once we have made peace with ourselves and practiced meditation to love and be compassionate to ourselves, we are ready for the second day.

Second Day – Offering Love to Our Loved Ones

On the second day, we apply the same reflection to our loved ones. We can focus on what is causing them suffering and how we can help them in the coming year. 

If there is something that we have done or said to cause them pain, we make a note to refrain from the same behavior patterns in the new year. 

Thich Nhat Hanh recommends we extend the love and compassion meditation to our loved ones on the second day. We can use the same meditation and say, ‘May you be peace and light in your body,’ ‘May you be safe and free from accidents’, etc. 

His practice helps us look at the root of our loved one’s suffering. If we can look at the root of someone’s suffering, we cannot be angry at them. Instead, we are compassionate towards them. 

When we can love ourselves and practice compassion towards our loved ones, we can move on to the third day of practice. 

Third-Day – Offering Love to All Beings

The third day of the practice involves extending love and compassion for all beings, including the ones that cause us suffering. According to Thich Nhat Hanh, If you can love yourself and your loved ones, you can love the one who caused you suffering. 

We can offer the same compassion meditation to all beings by replacing the words to say, ‘May all beings be light and peaceful in their body,’ etc.

Putting Practice into Action

As I began this practice to make peace with myself, I listed specific experiences with which I wasn’t at peace. I asked myself what would make me more at peace with the situation. 

This exercise helped and led the way to the next part, bringing to light qualities within myself that I want to nurture or shed within the new year. 

Embracing Growth & Nurturing Wisdom – Wholesome Qualities

In the new year, I want to nurture the wisdom and awareness I gained over the past year through mindfulness. The self-reflection through meditation and journaling allows me to look deeper into each situation before jumping to conclusions. 

I want to nurture the understanding I gained that each person tries to be happy and free from suffering. That most individuals are not trying to hurt us on purpose.

I’m nurturing to nurture the wisdom I gained in viewing people differently. Realizing that my biases influence my opinions inspires me to give people the benefit of the doubt and focus on positive qualities. 

Reflecting & Letting Go – Unwholesome Qualities

Reflecting on specific experiences and qualities that didn’t work for me over the past year, I can think of a few things I need to work on. 

I want to be able to work on controlling my emotions, especially in situations unfavorable to me. Someone’s behavior may not be correct, but its magnitude can depend on how I react. That’s the only thing in my control. 

I can practice letting go of the habit of ruminating. When things go wrong or someone says something hurtful, it can be hard not to play that track repeatedly in your mind. I can be more mindful and consciously divert it to something else. 

Not everything is fixable; sometimes, our choices or the choices of others that affect us leave cracks within us. These cracks are a part of life. If anything, they can be our great teachers. I want to practice letting go and accepting that we each have imperfections. 

Path to a Fresh & Happy New Year

As you explore this practice, you will find ways to tweak it and make it your own. Listening to Thich Nhat Hanh’s talk more than once guided me in making this practice my own.

This new year’s practice is a chance to break free from the old patterns and step into the new year with the right intention, beyond any career goals. It enables us to make peace with ourselves and accept ourselves with all our faults.

Let’s remember to practice self-love so we can love and accept others. Let’s remember to embrace the wholesome qualities that bring us happiness.

With mindfulness as our companion and a vision for our growth, we can stay on the path for a brighter and happier new year – truly new and transformed.

Resources

• Please refer to Thich Nhat Than’s New Year talk for an in-depth understanding of the practice. In addition to the three-day practice, He covers what it means to be mindful and how we practice it daily. 
• For an introduction to meditation, the Joy of Living course based on Tibetan meditation is a great way to learn the technique and understand the principles.