How To Find Your Forgotten Dreams In Life And Discover Your True Self
Do you have aspirations that you have put off or ignored? Most of us have dreams we have ignored or forgotten for various reasons. I have a big list of these. My list includes being able to speak Spanish, knowing how to scuba dive, being a triathlete, and more.
We think, If I had no restrictions on the money, I would do so and so. If I had time, I would do this, and so on.
We each have deep desires that excite us and inspire us. We keep putting these off for some day in the future because it’s not the right time. It may be a side of you that you have never experienced before that might scare you.
I have been reading a book called the Artist’s way by Julia Cameron. It is more like a 12-week course with thought-provoking weekly tasks and activities meant to unblock you. They unlock the creativity and any dreams you have buried underneath.
The Artist’s way inspired me to get in touch with a side of me that’s long been buried and dreams I have ignored for a while. It is the inspiration behind writing this post.
Attempting Our Life Backwards
In the book, the author shares a quote by Margaret young that strongly resonated with me.
Often people attempt to live their life backward: they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want so will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then, do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.
Margaret Young
We spend most of our time trying to be someone in the name of wealth or public validation. If we started doing the things we love that paid well, wouldn’t that be more fulfilling?
If no one in your close circle has been in roles you dreamed of, it seems like a far-fetched dream. Seeing someone you know do things makes it more relatable.
Finding What You Love
When I worked for Meta (Formerly Facebook), I listened to two live talks by Serena Williams and Gloria Estefan. I wondered what it was that made them so special. They seemed so reachable, just like any one of us. So, I thought, why not me if they could reach such great heights?
Within a few weeks, my blog was born. I didn’t aspire to be a writer growing up. Instead, I did what everyone wanted me to do. I tried to get good grades and pick a field that paid well. I got paid well and was good at what I did. It never did feed my soul, though.
If I could apply myself to someone else’s mission so much, what would I do if it were my mission?
The irony was that I never asked myself that question. What would I do if I had all the resources on earth? What would I work towards in life?
We don’t always know what we want to be right out of high school. Even if we think we do, we might change our minds later. It’s about experimenting with many things and discovering what brings us joy and where our strengths lie.
In a cafe I frequently work at, I heard a man share with a friend, my daughter hates what she is doing, but she is very good at it, and it pays her bills. It made me wonder how many of us are stuck in this situation.
The thing is, we all have this one life on earth. So we owe it to ourselves to try everything and figure out what suits us best and not have a whole bunch of what-ifs at the end of our journey.
Permission To Be A Beginner
As a child, I didn’t venture out to try many things because I was afraid I wouldn’t perform well. I thought it wasn’t worth pursuing if I wasn’t at the top.
Growing up in a culture where only folks at the top of their fields were appreciated didn’t help. But how do you get to be at the top of something when you don’t go through the journey from beginner to expert?
In the book Artist’s way, Julia says to recover as an artist, we must be willing to be bad artists. If we are willing to be bad artists, then we have a chance to be an artist and, over time, a very good one.
This concept applies to everything and not just artists. It applies to all the desires we have buried over time. Can we allow ourselves to be beginners and to be bad at something?
Creativity does not apply to artists alone. It applies to anyone who wants to bring creativity into whatever they try to do.
Unearthing Your Buried Aspirations And Dreams
To dig up our buried dreams, author Julia asks us to try a series of exercises. They are meant to be spontaneous. Speed kills the censor, she says.
- List five hobbies that sound fun.
- List five classes that sound fun.
- List five things you personally would never do that sound fun.
- List five skills that would be fun to have.
- List five things you used to enjoy doing.
As you do these exercises, you will notice the same things come up over and over again. You will find things you want to try but never did. You will notice things you admired in others but didn’t dare to try on your own. For instance, when I did my exercises, I saw scuba diving, painting, speaking Spanish, and acting come up repeatedly.
The Artist’s Way also recommends daily journaling to help you put in touch with undiscovered parts of you. It has helped me clarify my thoughts and discover my deepest wishes.
With these exercises of finding your buried aspirations, you may realize you have dreams you never knew you had. In addition, you may uncover parts of you that you are unaware of or afraid to admit.
I hope you try the exercises and reflect on what you have wished for a while. I hope you give yourself the permission to be a beginner in whatever you choose. I hope you get the chance to know the real you.
Look and you will find it – what is unsought will go undetected.
Sophocles
One Comment
Lawrence Quilici
Very good article. You are reaching out and inspiring others especially with the Artist Way Book. You are pointing the way…..